The woman I want to be....

AGH, I am 26, (enter existential crisis). No, not really, actually my last one was last year, this year leading up to my birthday I was so preoccupied with work and life that my birthday was secondary to everything else. I mean sure, I love a good party and presents (who doesnt?) but this year the road to 26 was pretty much like the road to any other birthday. Perhaps this is because I feel a sense of calm knowing whats to come, including lots of fun work projects, travel and winter (it isnt as cold as it was last year). This year however I did realized a few things, so here is my list of 10 things I've learnt thus far:

1. No is a complete sentance, and its certainly one worth learning.
2. Its ok to not be a club rat anymore (although I will admit to changing my mind every so often when I really want to go dancing).
3. Work can actually be fun (yes, that is if you love what you do, if not, I suggest taking a serious look at your work)
4.  Its totally ok to wake up on your birthday and work, your no longer the young twenty something year old you once were and thats ok, because you also know that with hard work comes play and nice holidays (yep thats me this morning)
5. To rethink all your friendships, no longer are you looking for friends for friendships sake, your looking for substance.
6. Spring cleaning your entire closet is totally in order, especially as you have slowly realized that your actually not into "can barely breathe" jeans.
7. Getting drunk alone with your favourite song on repeat is your idea of a good night out and thats totally fine.
8. Going to bed at 10pm is not only good for your skin but also for your health.
9. Starting to think about your wedding day is totally normal, single or coupled up, the thoughts are starting to form around the kind of marraiage you might want to have, starting of course with a nice party (aka wedding).
10. You like making lists, that's also totally normal and you have nothing to be ashamed of.

Now let me get back to work and blowing our imaginary candles (no cake this year just jazz with my mom and brother later, lots of good wine and risotto)

May Day May Day

image via garancedore.fr/en

For as long as I can remember, I have had a love hate relationship with the month of May. Mainly because it reminds me just how quickly the year has gone, and also because it marks the slow countdown to my birthday (May 20th eeeeeeeek). Unlike last year however, with just 15 days until my birthday I feel rather cool calm and collected, like the feeling you get when you know that everything will be ok! That's me right now, very zen (maybe its the wine but lets pretend its au natural). My change in mindset may have something to do with my steady relationship (we have to discuss this soon), the piles of projects I am currently working on that are making me happy and the fact that after deciding to not celebrate my birthday last year I've changed my mind because I've realized that in all actuality, getting older is a step in the right direction, to a place of acceptance, no more body woes and wisdom, and who doesn't want to be wiser?

For the most part what I am learning is to breathe a little easier. I know that as Generation Y we are often criticized for wanting too much too soon and for the most part that's true, but if you take a closer look at why we are the way we are, the internet has a big part to play in it all. From online sensations turned mega stars (I'm looking at you Justin Bieber) to the rise of reality TV, we are more connected than ever to whats happening around us and its easy to feel a little FOMO (I literally started liking my life more when Rihanna was off instagram, I felt like maybe we were living the same life - a girl can dream no?). Anyways, I for one have thought to myself on several occasions how nice it would be to be in Rihanna's shoes, I mean HELLO, who wouldn't? Or maybe be tech savvy enough to launch the new Facebook and become a billionaire in no time at all, but the reality is, that's not the reality for 99% of us so why bother stressing about it?

And yes it may seem when someone your age (like Taylor Swift who is 25 turning 26 like me) is globe trotting and dropping billboard 100 hits like its nothing, that you've failed, I sure felt like I have. But the thing is, that's her journey and I am sure even Ms. Swift wishes for something else sometimes, that's human nature after all. The point is to just get busy living, keep doing what you love and get on with it. Before you know it you'll be 65 and yes you may not have a star on the Hollywood walk of fame to show, or chart toppers but you should be happy with what you've created for yourself. So please excuse me whilst I plan a very chic (and budget friendly - I dont have Taylor bucks) party for my upcoming birthday and return to my zen state (that means another glass of wine).